My bread story

Yesterday at the grocery store I was checking out my favorite aisle, the discounted foods section, and came across a loaf of french bread. The bread, only 89 cents by the way, had this motto printed on the side: "Time to Eat Bread Again." This raises a lot of questions. When was it not time to eat bread? My first guess is that this is in reference to the Aktins no-carb diet that took America by storm. But that was what, 7 years ago? Are we just now getting back to being a bread-friendly country? That's a long time to recover. Perhaps it took that long to cleanse America's colons of all that beef, since that is apparently the only thing people eat on the Aktin's diet. This makes me wonder what kind of damage the Aktins diet did to the bread industry. Maybe it ran some of them out of business? Is that why this bread is only 89 cents? I just picture some bread factory shutting its doors as its owner stands in the parking lot, fist waving towards the heaven, cursing Robert Aktins and his carb hating habits.

File this under W for Well Ain't That A Bitch.

So yesterday I woke up to my alarm going off only to realize I was supposed to be at work RIGHT THEN. "Idiot!" I said to myself, "Why did you set your alarm for right at 10 and not earlier?" So I raced around like a chicken with my head cut off, brushed my teeth, got dressed, skipped breakfast and was about to race out the door when I looked at the clock once more. I realized it was 9 o'clock, not 10, and that my alarm was really just a reminder that I had to be up in an hour. "Oh how silly", I thought as I jumped back into bed, "At least I'm not really late." I quickly fell back asleep and continued sleeping for 2 whole hours, missing my REAL alarm plus 2 phone calls from my boss, wondering why I where I was.
The really silly thing was that I was only scheduled to work one hour, 10-11, and I had volunteered to come in and help the other person who would have been working alone. Luckily my boss was cool with it, and even seemed to see the humor in the situation, so no real harm was done.
But still, it was a quintessential "Well ain't that a bitch?" kind of moments.